Airplanes: Our Greatest Enemy



Daniel and his "Monday" friends @ a great park in Manila.



No, this is not a commentary on 9/11 or anything related to it. Instead, its about leaving and goodbyes, and being ones that don't leave and always have to say goodbye.



May & June around here are always tough. The end of the school year brings a relief as the grades are in and no more lesson plans need to be written for a while, but it also brings lots of necessary goodbyes, as people pack of for furloughs...or for good.

Until recently, my plan was to be one of the packer-uppers this June, and head back for a one year furlough. After all, its been six years since I've been on an official one, and three years now since I've touched U.S. soil. Unfortunately, the adoption process has not gone as quickly as I would wish (not that I really thought it would), so it means the trip stateside has to be delayed until the adoption is complete.



While I'm fine with the idea of staying another year before taking a furlough, what I'm NOT fine with is that I planned to leave at the same time as a certain group of people, and they are still leaving! Without me! Don't get me wrong - I'm very glad that there are other people who are also staying around for me to hang out with and to be my community. But my heart hurts at having to say goodbye, even if it is for a short while (for some).

What's worse is trying to explain goodbyes, even when people will be returning in 6 months to a year, to Daniel. So far, he just understands that people he likes having around keep getting on planes and flying out of his life. Nonnie (Grandma) did it in January. Madison did it in May. And now Aunt Val, Aunt Rhonda, Aunt Marla, and all of their familes will all be getting on planes within the next 2 weeks.



Since Madison left, we have dealt with some major disobedient uprisings. For those who don't know, Madison student taught at Faith Jan. - May, and lived with Daniel and me. He got very attached, and was so sad when she had to head back stateside. While some of the behavior is probably just typical 2 year old stuff, I am also fairly sure that a lot of it stems from A) feeling abandoned by Madison and B) fear of abandonment from Mommy. It includes some typical RAD stuff, a lot of testing and even manipulation. Overall, it makes me feel like a pretty terrible parent, especially when he is acting out around other kids (lots of pushing, hitting, grabbing...and waiting to gauge my reaction).

Please pray for us, when you think about it. These goodbyes are going to be hard, the summer will be lonely, and Daniel needs to learn to trust that I am not leaving, even when the community around him changes so drastically.